Counselling in Dorset – A Space to Work at Your Pace
Welcome to Pensieve.
I’m Nicky.
The name of my practice is inspired by the idea of a “pensieve” — a magical bowl used to pause, reflect, and gently explore thoughts and experiences.
Here, it becomes a space to explore your thoughts, gain clarity, and grow. My work is trauma-informed and is shaped by an understanding of the nervous system, neuroscience, parts work, Focusing, and relational patterns. I think of these as different areas that can support your self-exploration, a bit like Google Earth, helping us zoom in and out as needed, to bring a clearer sense of what’s going on for you.
I’ve explained below how I work, based on some common topics, but if anything isn’t covered or you’d like to ask something directly, you’re very welcome to get in touch.
Nicky x
Tailoring sessions to suit you
A calm, supportive space for one-to-one counselling
Counselling is your space, and the way we work together should feel safe, supportive, and right for you.
Whether you are having counselling, coaching or supervision, I’m happy to explore different ways of working so that therapy fits your needs, not the other way around.
This is especially important if you are neurodivergent (e.g. Autistic or have ADHD), as traditional session formats may not always feel comfortable or effective.
Sessions tailored to suit you
You might prefer shorter, longer or more frequent sessions instead of the usual 1 hour.
You might prefer a visual or hands-on approach, or having written summaries of what we discuss.
Sometimes, a quiet space with minimal distractions or the option to move around during sessions can make it easier to engage.
You are welcome to bring objects that help you feel safe or grounded, such as a cuddle toy, blanket, or knitting.
You may prefer more space to think and process your thoughts, or find silence too overwhelming
You can have more structure to sessions or allow yourself to go with what spontaneously emerges.
You may find that in-person counselling suits you best, but you may equally prefer telephone or online counselling, all of which I will tailor to what works best for you whenever possible.
Express yourself - Creativity in counselling
This way of working can feel very natural for some, and unfamiliar at first for others, and that’s completely okay.
Using creativity, metaphor, and imagery can be a gentle yet powerful way of working with your nervous system, particularly when navigating anxiety, depression, PTSD, or the effects of difficult or unhealthy relationships.
It can help make sense of complex experiences and reconnect thoughts and emotions, allowing exploration of experiences and feelings attached without becoming overwhelming or avoiding them.
Bring your imagination and creativity.
I encourage you to bring your imagination and creativity in whatever way feels natural to you.
Over time, many clients find this helps them make sense of difficult feelings and begin to see themselves more compassionately.
You might notice connections between what we explore in sessions and your interests, hobbies, or everyday life. For example:
Gamers may relate to characters, storylines, or different “parts” of themselves
An architect might think about relationships in terms of structure or foundations
A cook might use recipes or ingredients to understand how different parts come together
A gardener might see emotions like plants—what’s thriving, what needs care, and what supports growth
Music lovers may connect with lyrics, songs, or sound as a way of expressing and processing feelings
You may also notice me summarising or highlighting points using examples from everyday life, stories, or programmes like Doctor Who or The Big Bang Theory—to help bring ideas to life in a relatable way.
This approach can also blend naturally with elements of life and health coaching. If it doesn’t feel right for you, that’s completely okay—sessions are always adapted to suit you and what works best.
This way of working can be helpful for both adults and teenagers.
Call now
There is no need to talk about anything too difficult for you.
This is just a chance to ask any questions and see how you feel about working with me.
Supporting your nervous system
Anxiety, Stress, Depression, PTSD, Relationships, Bereavement and Life Choices
Beyond our thoughts – it’s physical.
It isn’t as simple as just stopping your reactions, or you would, right? These responses are carried within the nervous system, shaped and reinforced by past experiences, even when they no longer reflect your present reality. For various reasons, your nervous system can get “stuck” in fight/flight/freeze responses, which can affect your mental and physical health.
Many people cope with stress or strong emotions by pushing feelings away, ignoring them, or trying to control them, which can actually make the body feel more tense or anxious over time.
Hence, why I work with your nervous system rather than against it.
When I talk about working with your nervous system, I mean noticing what your body and mind are doing right now and supporting them to regulate naturally.
Your nervous system is constantly scanning for safety and threat. When it sends up a “warning,” the aim isn’t to automatically follow it or push it away, but to become curious about what it might be responding to.
If we override it completely, we can end up pushing ourselves into situations that genuinely aren’t safe or right for us.
If we treat every signal as absolute truth, we can get stuck in avoidance, even when the “threat” isn’t actually real or current.
This isn’t about forcing emotions or trying to “fix” or change them. It’s about: recognising your body’s signals (a racing heart, a tight chest, tense muscles) and allowing yourself to feel and acknowledge emotions safely as they arise.
Over time, your nervous system may begin to feel more flexible, balanced, and in control. Becoming your guide.
Behind the scenes - building a new instruction manual
Reorganising information, categorising experiences, and archiving what’s no longer needed. This process forms or reactivates neural pathways that help you regulate more easily, allowing your body to move from states of alertness, overwhelm, or shutdown back towards calm.
Some changes happen quickly, while others take more time and patience. For this reason, some people find that a few sessions are enough, while others benefit from longer-term support. This often depends on a combination of stress capacity, attachment patterns, past experiences, physical health and medication, current coping strategies, and what’s currently happening in your life.
It isn’t always easy to know at the beginning how many sessions might be needed. We’ll start, though, by getting a sense of what’s brought you to this point, and then keep things under review so we can make sure our work together is sitting right with you.
Understanding relationship patterns(including the relationship with yourself)
We all develop ways of connecting and relating to others through relationships, difficult experiences, bullying, or physical and emotional abuse. These experiences can shape how safe we feel about ourselves, how safe we feel with others and how we expect to be treated.
The physical and emotional impact of this can stay with us, sometimes showing up as strong reactions in certain relationships or situations, even when we don’t fully understand why.
Parts work
You might think of emotions and experiences as being held as various “parts” within the nervous system. These parts can sometimes group similar experiences and may also contain different layers. They often organise things in ways that were protective at the time, stepping in automatically in certain moments based on what the nervous system has learned feels safe or unsafe, but may no longer fully fit the present experience.
Some parts carry pain, some protect us, and some hold our strengths. These parts, along with emotions and beliefs, sometimes conflict, overlap, support, or even contradict each other, which can leave thoughts and feelings feeling confusing or blocked.
How this can show up
Over time, many of us move away from our more authentic self—the part of us that feels natural, open, and at ease. Instead, we adapt to cope or to feel accepted.
You might notice patterns such as people-pleasing, avoiding conflict, becoming overly independent, or feeling anxious about closeness or distance in relationships.
Along the way, we may begin to suppress certain emotions, feel overwhelmed by them, or show only the parts of ourselves that feel acceptable. This can sometimes lead to self-criticism, frustration, or confusion.
These are natural ways your mind and nervous system have learned to keep you safe.
They can also shape how you cope with stress, manage emotions, and navigate relationships in everyday life.
Becoming your guide
The Inside Out Disney films are a great way to understand this. They show how our emotions can work together and how we can learn to ignore or avoid certain aspects of ourselves, whether positive or negative.
In therapy, the focus isn’t on blame. Instead, it’s about noticing what’s going on for you.
We gently explore different aspects of yourself, what the different parts might be protecting, their fears, and why they may feel frustrated or in harmony with other parts. You may notice different parts holding certain thoughts, emotions, or physical sensations in specific situations or relationships. This can help you understand why certain emotional or reactive patterns arise, and support you in pausing, responding, and communicating your experience more clearly.
Sometimes these patterns are easy to notice, and at other times they may only become clear over time.
By safely connecting with these aspects of yourself in the present moment, you can begin to:
Separate past experiences from the present moment
Respond to yourself with care rather than judgment
Make choices that feel more comfortable and aligned with you
Authenticity grows as autonomy strengthens
Recognising nervous system responses, patterns and the different parts of you that have developed over time can bring a deeper understanding of yourself.
Like a tuning fork, as this awareness grows, it can become easier to respond from a place that feels more grounded and authentic, rather than reacting automatically.
If you’re unsure where to start, you’re welcome to get in touch; we can figure it out together.
Nicky x
I am also an Anxiety UK Approved Therapist providing therapeutic support to the charity’s members and partner beneficiaries. I am subject to Anxiety UK’s regular monitoring of my professional qualifications, supervision, continual professional development, insurance, and professional body membership in addition to complying with the ethical framework and professional standards set down by my registered governing body.
You can also view my profile on Counselling Directory or Psychology today which also has some articles you may find of interest.
Call now
There is no need to talk about anything too difficult for you.
This is just a chance to ask any questions and see how you feel about working with me.
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